As one who has sipped his nectar and been oiled and massaged like a slippery fish beneath the coconut palms, I sometimes fantasise about the ultimate tropical beach resort. Suppose you could take the scenery from this one, the service from that, the Bermudan barman from yet another and the Thai massage girl who just walked down your back? What would the perfect resort look like? First, there needs to be separation from the workaday world, and therefore an island resort is the go. It must also be remote enough from mobile phone signals to eliminate the possibility that the gent in the next sun lounge will conduct a braying phone conversation with his broker. Sand is a must, and strange as...
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